I noticed recently that “Do you love me?” – or some form of it such as “Do you like me?” – is a question that may underlie much of my behavior with other people. I appear to “come from” it as I engage with them.
My day-to-day interactions with other people seem to begin with a subtle sense of whether or not someone’s energy feels preferred, or not, by some layer of my own energetic fields. This may, and I suspect does, occur before I am consciously aware of their presence but certainly happens as I become aware of them. This “feeling out” occurs before any thoughts about the matter arise. There are always energetic interactions going on. We all exist in the same energetic ecosystem and will feel the back-and-forth interplay, particularly when in some kind of physical or visual proximity, whether we are conscious of it or not.
If I become consciously aware of someone’s presence, then thinking will usually follow. Whether I attend to those thoughts will depend on where and how my attention is currently focused and how much time I have. Walking down the street or in a grocery store, I may have the impulse to simply say hello to someone. That process occurs extremely rapidly, but there is still energetic sensing and choosing going on, which I rarely observe. Although it is not common for me, these may lead to some brief pleasant banter, if circumstances make that possible and my sensings pull me in that direction. In a way, it is mostly automated, energetic machinery and I am reacting to subtle preferences.
With those whom I have any prolonged interaction, some aspect of me will assess whether this person’s energy, as deep as I can feel it at the moment, is such that I want to interact with them or not. In short, do I want them to like me or not? If not, I keep exchanges brief or ignore them altogether, if civility allows for that. If so, I play it by ear. But there is some level of back and forth exchange where I tune to the deepest space in them that is visible to me and I speak from the space in me that sees it into that place in them, which might be listening – available for tuning. I think that it is both to transmit to where some deep receptivity dwells and to listen to what arises from that space, as it flows back to where my own speaking arose. It is both curiosity and, I think, a natural desire to experience resonance. It might be called the desire to be seen and accepted, but reaching a common resonance feels like a better description, given my energetic way of experiencing the world.
It appears that every aspect of this identity is seeking the pleasure of experiencing resonance. This “Do You Love Me?” quest is, thus, occurring at multiple levels and the aspects of me that perceive each of them wants to sense that belonging, that love. My natural impulse to speak to the deepest, slowest frequency that I can “see” is because deep resonance seems to also satisfy the craving for resonance of the faster frequencies, which they too seek. Those faster frequencies rest upon the deep, slower ones, just as smaller waves ride along the top of larger ones, and are impacted when the deeper ones are. But this does not appear to work in reverse. A pure resonance in the range of one’s normal everyday world will, it seems to me, not automatically resonate with the deeper, more ancestral layers. How one person expresses love or appreciation may “satisfy” the desire for resonance at one level but not another. Yet if that resonance, that love reverberates deeply, the more superficial ranges are generally melded into that parent energy and they too are “satisfied” in that resonance.
I’m wondering if, perhaps, it is the deep gravity of original Singularity that is pulling us back towards unity, underlying all frequencies and thus bleeding into every layer of my consciousness. We are multi-frequency creatures and it may be that part of what we seek is the pleasure of resonance, of re-uniting, the delight in finding and being found at every frequency range to which we have access. The older and deeper the resonance, the more of us are swept up and, like the faster frequencies, are absorbed into that love.
Ah, this is beautiful. Quite resonant in a standing on tiptoes sort of way.
As to “some aspect of me will assess whether this person’s energy, as deep as I can feel it at the moment, is such that I want to interact with them or not. In short, do I want them to like me or not?”
You must be more evolved than me. I notice that I want people to like me even when I don’t feel resonance with them!
As I read the closing I can feel that pull ‘back towards unity,’ and note the irony in my initial perception of ‘back’ referencing the past and what once was and then feel that sudden reminder of it meaning what will again be. And maybe most importantly the realization of what always is outside of and cradling what has been and what will be.
I can feel frequencies waking up that hark back to a time and experience that I have not remembered in this lifetime. There is a resonance of yore, of re-uniting, and as you say a delight in finding and being found at every frequency range to which we are given access here and now.
And even in the newness of this discovery there is the deep sense not only of having been here before but the knowing that I–We–always have been in this space, not just in reverie, but in every sense of what is True.