Do You Love Me?
I noticed recently that “Do you love me?” – or some form of it such as “Do you like me?” – is a question that may underlie much of my behavior with other people. I appear to “come from” it as I engage with them.
My day-to-day interactions with other people seem to begin with a subtle sense of whether or not someone’s energy feels preferred, or not, by some layer of my own energetic fields. This may, and I suspect does, occur before I am consciously aware of their presence but certainly happens as I become aware of them. This “feeling out” occurs before any thoughts about the matter arise. There are always energetic interactions going on. We all exist in the same energetic ecosystem and will feel the back-and-forth interplay, particularly when in some kind of physical or visual proximity, whether we are conscious of it or not.
If I become consciously aware of someone’s presence, then thinking will usually follow. Whether I attend to those thoughts will depend on where and how my attention is currently focused and how much time I have. Walking down the street or in a grocery store, I may have the impulse to simply say hello to someone. That process occurs extremely rapidly, but there is still energetic sensing and choosing going on, which I rarely observe. Although it is not common for me, these may lead to some brief pleasant banter, if circumstances make that possible and my sensings pull me in that direction. In a way, it is mostly automated, energetic machinery and I am reacting to subtle preferences.
With those whom I have any prolonged interaction, some aspect of me will assess whether this person’s energy, as deep as I can feel it at the moment, is such that I want to interact with them or not. In short, do I want them to like me or not? If not, I keep exchanges brief or ignore them altogether, if civility allows for that. If so, I play it by ear. But there is some level of back and forth exchange where I tune to the deepest space in them that is visible to me and I speak from the space in me that sees it into that place in them, which might be listening – available for tuning. I think that it is both to transmit to where some deep receptivity dwells and to listen to what arises from that space, as it flows back to where my own speaking arose. It is both curiosity and, I think, a natural desire to experience resonance. It might be called the desire to be seen and accepted, but reaching a common resonance feels like a better description, given my energetic way of experiencing the world.
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