Evolution-Development

Where Are Your Feelings?

/

It seems that providing an easier way to understand frequencies will be useful. I’ve lived with them so long that I have failed to take notice of the difficulty that getting a sense of them can pose.

One clear place to look at them is an old saying, “the eyes are the windows to the soul”. When someone is exuberant, you know it. You don’t have to be told. When someone is suffering, it’s the same. If you are in any conversation, particularly a difficult one, you are constantly assessing another’s reaction to what you have said and “where they are coming from” when they are talking. All of this is taken into account in each moment and your responses will be dictated by what you are “getting” from them. In my experience, each and every nuance is a blend of frequencies. You are not just assessing body language, you are inherently sensing the energies that are being evoked and expressed, along with those that are being comingled between you. This is not something that you needed to be taught. It is a compilation of all of your enculturation and personal experience since you’ve been on the planet.

Yes, you can clearly see it in the eyes of another, and that may be how you would normally describe it. But I suspect that you mostly aren’t conscious of the give and take of this process as it is occurring. You just interact naturally. I clearly remember overhearing half of a phone conversation my daughter was having with a friend when she was in her early teens. I was aware that she was bouncing thoughts off of her friend and adjusting them based on the response. I remember thinking that I was watching her develop her public persona by this interaction, of which I’m sure there were hundreds. She was sorting out what was being well received and what wasn’t and modifying her presentation as she conversed. She was becoming someone new as she went along and she did not need to see those eyes to sense where her friend was coming from. These sensings, these feelings cannot even be articulated by an infant or young child but to anyone who has interacted with babies, it is clear that there is a give-and-take in which each participant is gauging reaction and responding accordingly. Any parent knows that babies and very young children are easily distracted. They can be drawn away from a particular object of their attention with relative ease, which is very useful tool that every parent has used. Today we might call that “changing the topic”. The same method can still be used to divert attention away from a line of discussion that is not preferred. We picked this up from our parents long ago and have not abandoned it because it can still be useful, whether we are doing it automatically or deliberately. …

Where Are Your Feelings?Read More »

Evolution-Development

Layers of Belonging

/

If it is true that the universe started with a singularity, and has evolved over the eons into more diverse and complex forms, then back upstream we are obviously more communal and, at points, unified. Alan Watts said “…we grow out of this world exactly the same way that apples grow out of the apple tree.” We are growing out of this world, which is our source, as the Sun is the source of life on the planet, and the galaxy is the parent of the solar system, thus us.

It seems logical to me that the impact of every energetic range of any I/We is most noticeably experienced at the levels at which that particular attention is normally focused. The result is that there are a vast number of levels at which we experience belonging but we tend to be most aware of those in ranges in which we live our daily lives, which I have called our “frequency neighborhood”. As I’ve said before, the higher frequencies at which we normally operate are instinctually more present to us than, for instance, something like the frequency at which the Earth transits around the Sun, which we perceive as relatively slow and, only mentally at that.

So I think that we are pulled gravitationally towards our sense of every relatively unified “I” all along those many upstream layers of consciousness. The farther upstream that gravitation is, the less we are aware of it. Imagine your awareness moving up the branches of a tree towards the trunk.

At every intersection where branches merge, you would become aware of the larger communal self of that branch and become aware of the attributes of the smaller branches that you feed. We KNOW that we “belong” there but from downstream near smallest branches, that is experientially far away and is thus usually too subtle to be noticed. It seems to me that belonging is a form of resonant tuning, which is experienceable at an infinite number of levels. I think that we tend to look for evidence of that resonance to be manifested at every level from our deepest experience of it, down into our normal daily operating range. When we fall in love with someone, that sense of deep communion seems to rise up into every aspect of our lives. But over time we do seem to drift back towards the frequency ranges that we have most commonly inhabited. Does that love, that deep communion continue to manifest in our daily frequency ranges in ways that we can recognize in our daily lives? Are those we love saying so? Are there little acts of kindness?

…

Layers of BelongingRead More »

Language

Linking Energy and Language

/

Firstly, I want to acknowledge Jeff Carreira, whose eight month “Intensive” ended with a four day retreat last weekend (June 7-12). My book was an “articulation project”, which each participant created in some form. Writing it, and presenting it at the retreat, has left me with an experience of a deep emptiness. At this point Becoming’s urgency, at least as I had encountered its most intense aspects, has vanished from my experiential environment.

 

On the last day of the retreat, Jeff had us go for a “saunter” (R.W. Emerson style) with a partner and share the history of our spiritual path. One thing I’d forgotten in my reporting, but came at the end of the walk, was that at times when I was very young I often felt like I was at the bottom of a vortex of energy, much like water going down a drain. It seemed inescapable, as that intense flow was driving “me” downward.  The experience was what I would describe as depression. On occasion, however, I’d drop into a deep silence. I was safe there, but the world always called me out of that space – for dinner, chores or just the noise of parents and 5 siblings – and the doorway out of that space led me back through the depression energy.

When sharing this with my partner, what came to me was that I felt very much in tune with that silent space and that the energy of wanting to be a recluse, which has been growing very intense over the last 6 months or so, was the call to go “home” to that silence. My retirement is approaching and represents a time that I could actually do that for the first time in my life and I can remain there if I so choose, though I was not conscious this connection. What came up in thought form was “I want to go home”. It brought me to tears both the moment that I saw it, and when I shared it with the group shortly thereafter. What is most curious now is that the intensity of the pull to be a recluse disappeared for a time. I am having sensings of it, now and then, since the weekend but the cognitive understanding of the link quickly releases its gravitational pull.

…

Linking Energy and LanguageRead More »

Evolution-Development, The WE

The Fluid Borders of I and We

/

I’ve long been clear that since all frequencies are moving – and my experience outside of that flux is extremely rare – whatever is experienced as “I” in a given moment is, in some way, also moving. But everything that comes out of my mouth is coming from a perspective – a particular flow – and “I” am clearly not any one perspective. Yet any given perspective often feels to be a result of other perspectives coming together in some kind of revealed frequency. At first I thought that the disparate frequencies merged into a concentrated form that blinded “me” to their former experiential distinctness but it seems that it’s a bit more complex than that. The more I observed the process the more it seemed as if there is a given moment in which a transformation occurs. It appeared that the perspectives were vying for the attention of an observer, that was allowing each to have their say, and at some point the observer enters the space and the noise is quelled by its presence. There then is a separate and distinct place from which a description arises adjacent to that relative silence, like a commentator at a sporting event, and that description defines the boarders of a new distinction.

Experientially, the many perspectives were converted from distinct particles (many transiting perspectives) to one very long wavelength (a singular perception) and was then articulated by an “I”, which I always and only describe as “me”. So it appears that there is a process from experiencing a collection of perspectives, to an observer and an assessor, which in a way declares the resulting point of view. Yet again, where focused attention lies is what determines how I experience myself at any given moment.

…

The Fluid Borders of I and WeRead More »

Uncategorized

Speaking of Energy

/

 

If you have not read my book, please read the “PAGES” on the left, at a minimum “The Soup” and “Choice and Appreciation”. You will need them for context. The video “Frequency Basics” may also be useful.

 

 

 

 

The book is a series of essays, just like the Blog, since my mind seems to bring things to me in these short, sometimes unconnected, moments of inspiration. Some of them are taken directly from this site but many more were written for the book.

You can read it here:  Speaking of Energy PDF  (right click to download)

OR get a paperback copy here Speaking of Energy

Choice, The Mind

A Well Oiled Machine

/

The mind is often pointed to as a “problem” and it certainly can appear that way at times. But it seems to me to just be a machine that does what we command it to do. “I am….” fill in the blank, and it just does what we told it to do. Any choice, declaration, command etc. is an instrument by which we give it instructions, from “I’m reliable” to “He’s a jerk”. Part of its nature, which is what we sometimes disparage, is that it defends the commands that we give it, a form of a survival mechanism.

It seems to me that any distinction generates a boundary between itself and anything else and that perhaps some survival mechanism comes along with the act of distinguishing. In the case of a command/choice directed to the mind, this means that not only is it to be executed as instructed, but also to be defended against contrary perspectives. It’s the defense that is more obvious than our choice that created it in the first place since being “defensive” is frowned upon and threatens our inclination to be liked/included.

Part of our conflicted natures is due to the fact that we have made many choices that are contradictory. We are often a mass of internal conflicts of interest of our own making. Internally we can chastise ourselves for acts or words that we regret, when in actuality we have simply allowed one of our own choices to override another. Choosing between any two is sometimes conscious but more typically automated. The automation comes in the form of underlying preferences, which I’ve addressed before, and may depend on a range of things but at least one’s “mood”, how far upstream the command was placed and the amount of energy (intensity) with which it was put there. “He’s a jerk” is a pretty narrow focal range but “I’m reliable” is, though filtered, flavoring a wide variety of behaviors and part of the mind is always on the job watching out to defend the command. The ones that are less deep, like “He’s a jerk”, are often easily discarded by being present to either our deeper commitments or to qualities in that person that resonate with our deeper selves. But those that lie farther upstream can be more entrenched and hold more sway. As in the movie “2001: A Space Odyssey”, the computer ignored what it considered lower level commands of the astronauts and followed the instructions higher upstream in the command structure.

…

A Well Oiled MachineRead More »

Choice

Letting Go

/

Babies do not need to be trained in “letting go”. Initially, letting go is their natural state and they are being trained to focus here in order to grasp and get some relative stability in the wavelengths at which we operate. But once they are well grounded adults, it seems important to bring that finely-honed cognitive ability to bear on the choices that were made both before and during the process of bringing our focused attention to this “place”. It is my view that we consciously chose to be here and that part of the process of acclimating to these frequency ranges is to bring that same conscious capacity into our cognitive awareness here. If we are to fulfill our intention for being here, we must first and foremost become conscious of what it was. Regardless of whether we came to play, create, observe or whatever, in order to actively participate in the completion of our intent, the first step must certainly be to sensitize ourselves to the direction in which our preferences – the nudging of our earlier choices – lead us, and to deliberately choose to move in that direction. Ideally, it would behoove us to be consciously aware of our intent for this particular life and re-choose it in a form that will most fully manifest it here.

So, how do we come to dis-cover the choice or choices that resulted in this life? There are an immense number of layers of choice but I examine most of the ones that I come into contact with in a similar way. Some show up as broad and subtle preferences, which become apparent by observing every-day life. Others may better be described as habitual behaviors. Here I’m not referring to something repetitive in the sense of putting fork to mouth but habitual in the sense of something automated and not preferred. In both the broad and the particular I’m looking for what it is that is recurring. Examining them will reveal choices typically laid down behind the manifestation of the behaviors themselves. The first aspect of the examination is to cognitively observe the habitual behavior, see what patterns are visible within it, what repeats. The second is how do those habitual actions or preferences feel? What is the flavor of the experience? This begins with choosing to sense what is present in the moments that you find yourself in a repetitive behavior. Whether it is gross, subtle or causal, the body is the only input device that we have, so the simple sensing of what we “feel” must be the place to start. This is not how we feel about it but what sensations are being felt. What is important to note here is that you cannot examine feelings unless you are in the experience. If you are angry you could try and examine your thoughts and actions after the fact, but you can only observe the physical sensations that are manifesting in the body during the experience. So, if you want to fully unpack something, it is best that you be cognitively conscious during the event but it is essential that you be sensually conscious during it. The first requires active inquiry and the second only observing. But, as I pointed to in Language and Reality, the words and the energy are linked by cognitive association and so what you hear in your head is directly connected to what you are feeling in your body so it’s best to do the work in the moment that the experience is occurring. I do realize this isn’t pleasant or easy but it is useful in making distinctions.

…

Letting GoRead More »

Creation-Appreciation

Grace

/

I’ll start out this piece by noting that all experiences are transitory. I will also say that due to the fact that everything is in constant motion, any assessment or meaning that I assign to a particular experience comes to me in one instant that will never be repeated again in precisely the same way. So this description, like everything else that I have to say, may be temporarily useful but it will eventually transit out of existence regardless of how much energy I apply in order to keep it congealed for a time.

In my current thinking, as I have stated before, Becoming is incessantly creative, and all of the energies created by that intent down through the eons are still experienceable; though those that are most upstream are mostly imperceptible in the maelstrom of the more localized frequency ranges in which we typically play. At every level along that pathway, the manifestations of Becoming’s creative nature are displays of beauty, and therefore intended to be appreciated. At my current location I have access to the experience of beauty on all of the levels at which I have current conscious awareness, and that obviously includes those expressions which are perceptible to the senses of this physical body. I can hear a beautiful song, feel a warm spring breeze, see the majesty of the Milky Way and taste the glorious flavor of Ben and Jerry’s “Chocolate Therapy”. Each has its own impact on me, depending on how focused I am, and how much I choose to immerse “myself” into the experience of appreciation. That immersion momentarily extracts “me” – my current point of attention – from the creative downstream flow of Becoming, “I” drift upstream a bit and contemplate the beauty of what is observed, and appreciate it (and/or assess it for modification in line with further perfection).

Now I’ll flip the perspective to being on the receiving end of appreciation instead of doing the appreciating. When my children were little there was often an invitation, sometimes verbal, of “look what I can do!” or “look at me!” They seemed to drink deeply of any praise given. They clearly yearned for it. It is, as I see it, a microcosm of the inherent cycle of creating and appreciating, on which my writing rests. The child does or makes something about which they are excited, and then shares it in order to have that creation appreciated. They soak up appreciation and are pleased with themselves, I would say, for making a contribution and being recognized for doing so. This process exists in an inconceivable number of ways, and on an inconceivable number of levels of awareness; the grander the creation – that is, the larger it appears relative to my current perspective – the grander the potential for appreciation. And given the stream of consciousness from the dawn of time until this moment, focused points of awareness at every level and perspective are appreciating what “they/it” observe and are always being appreciated from “above” – upstream – at the same time.

…

GraceRead More »

Uncategorized

What is True?

/

I’m going to point to two facets of truth, and am not saying there aren’t more. Becoming’s truth is a full throated intent, created by pure Will, which imagines what might exist next and that truth comes into being upon the manifestation of that intent.

The second is related to the first in that it is a discovery of an existing (could be described as earlier) intent of Becoming from a downstream perspective looking back upstream to its source. As I’ve stated before, the shorter wavelengths exist within, or are riders on, longer wavelengths. The longer wavelengths are reflective of broader collective intent (the Earth’s orbit around the Sun rides along inside of the rotation of our galaxy). Thus the long wavelengths appear downstream as more stable – reside in relative stillness – so the articulations of the experience of those wavelengths feel more true.

What I’m suggesting is that what we experience as true is based on the relative wavelengths we are opened into by someone’s expression or what wavelength we tap into that speaks its expression to us.

Truth is truth, but always momentary. However, truths at the longest wavelengths are seen downstream as really true because they are true for a longer period of relative time. They will appear stable due to their depth but will be discarded as one, hopefully, transits on to the next ranges of relatively longer wavelengths. In this model the longest wavelength might be the motion of the expanding universe, whose expression would be most true.

The WE

Surrender and Polarity

/

The word surrender is bandied about in spiritual circles as the necessary active ingredient to the growth of one’s consciousness awareness. Though I will not dispute the accuracy of what is pointed to, I do have my own take on it.

I have long had a resistance to the use of the word “surrender” when it comes to spiritual work. The inference is that there is something that one is surrendering to. If you believe in a form of a second person God – and I am well aware of Wilber’s articulation of first, second and third person pronouns and their ramifications– then that makes sense. I am not arguing against the existence of aspects of “other” – some collection of a We – that are experienceable on levels at which our depths cohabitate with “them”. I am also not disputing that the deeper one reaches into those depths, one might understandably experience the many – in some collective I/We – and view one collective of that relative singularity as divine. I do, in fact, believe that communing with all aspects of our depths is a necessary component of the growth cycle. What I am saying is that there is an experiential difference between surrendering in the form of “you know better than I so lead me” and “This moment’s focused “I” is releasing its grip on the present view to experience the more subtle – the next moment’s We”.

The first example relinquishes choice to someone or some otherness, inferring that the “I” that chooses is not responsible for its choices, which to me is never the case. This momentary I may receive intuition or insight but must then always choose to accept, alter or decline that insight based on the current relevant circumstances in which it finds itself. The current I is always the master of its choices.

I perceive the second example as recognition that some aspect of this self is stuck on one of its created “I” positions, and is “letting go” – my preferred term – in order to release its current gravitational constraints and drift upstream, where a deeper aspect of “I” peers out from its relatively longer range of waveforms. The “I” in those ranges will more clearly observe the long-range alignment or misalignment of the choices occurring in the frequency neighborhoods that “my” downstream point of focused attention is dwelling on. Surrendering my current declarations and certainties will, in essence, discharge agency of its creative intent for a while and allow attention to drift towards the natural gravity of Being.

shutterstock_414846625Up and down the entire spectrum of consciousness, the experience of the many (We) and the singularity (I) will always be accessible. There is a natural flow between the two. They are, metaphorically, two sides of the same coin. It is only a matter of focus. There is, in my view, an ongoing flip-flop between collections of my variable “I/We” and the associated perspectives.

I find it amusing, sometimes, that each perspective that I flow through, at any give moment, tends to resist every other at some level. In a manner of speaking, in order to be a perspective, the boundary that identifies its distinctness must exclude otherness in order to have form. That, I think, is the source of my sometimes knee-jerk resistance to many sorts of exclusionary declarations, even though I am aware that it is built into very nature of the I/We polarity. Energetically, the very existence of the I/We interplay depends upon the natural resistance that polarities exhibit. Without that multidimensional interplay, we’d have no playground. We’d be a singularity back at the beginning planning to generate another. Some version of will “I” want to go out and play again.

 

Scroll to Top